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@ 3:24 p.m.
I slept for 17 hours last night. We just came back from Las Vegas and it was more tiring than I anticipated.
I dreamt about Jason last night, someone who I haven't thought about in many years. I used to dream about him a lot maybe 4 or 5 years ago. Well, I shouldn't say a lot, but considering that I haven't talked to him since college, the number of dreams I had was quite surprising. I suppose it's because I think about him probably more than the other friends I had in high school. However, it's been a while since I've had one, and I think the reason this was even brought about was because we played board games with some people while we were in Vegas. They were friend of friend of C's from college. I get freaked out when I meet friends of friends that they will figure out that I'm essentially friends-less. Without C, I wouldn't have any friends because essentially the only "friends" that I have/know is people that he met and became friends with.
In any case, I went on facebook today after over 4 years or so. I hadn't been able to go on it because my account was locked out or something like that. It asked me to provide a photo ID to get the account back and I had tried like 3 years ago but it wouldn't work. I don't know, I don't remember anymore. The point is that I was prepared to try to go through the process of unlocking it, but I signed in without issue... I don't know why it decided to work now. I looked through it to find that not really anything has changed with facebook... apparently some people have removed me as friends. I find that to be kind of funny as I don't post anything so it's not like I'm spamming up someone's pages. I suppose some people actually want to keep their facebook pages up to date? I don't know. In any case, I was thinking of sending Jason a message but come to find out that he's deleted himself from facebook. I noticed there was a category of people who had deleted themselves but that their pages were still there, and it said that if they wanted to come back to facebook, they could claim their accounts and we would still be friends. However, I guess Jason deleted his facebook account so long ago that he wasn't even listed there. I also tried to sign into to my AOL messenger screenname because we used to chat on there but then it said that AOL had deleted my account due to inactivity. I'm doubtful in any case that he would've been on there. No one goes on AOL anymore right? That was only popular when I was in high school.
What does it matter I suppose... If he was still on facebook, would I actually have messaged him? Or maybe I would've spied his page, logged off and everyone would've been none the wiser.
I guess in this aspect I've always been lacking. I don't know how to make friends. I certainly don't know how to keep friends. I am bad bad bad at it.