<< 04-25-12 >>

424

@ 2:33 p.m.

man, i was doing so well until now. i had written quite consistently and then nothing for two weeks.

there's really nothing to update, but i've been bored as hell at work. it's probably not necessarily for the lack of work, because i sometimes end up staying overtime because i wasn't able to finish my work, but rather, i just don't feel like doing the things i need to do.

esp today i don't feel so great. i guess there's only an hour and half left though. i was on craigslist a little bit more, i think 2 weeks ago. i thought i had really found someone i could be friends with, but that person never wrote me back. i feel like i'm starting to become desperate for a friend, but i haven't and i don't plan to do anything that would require me to do anything crazy to obtain a friend. i mean, i still want to be comfortable while being with someone.

i've come to the conclusion that i'm just socially awkward. that picture of socially awkward penguin, that's me, but worse. i honestly don't know how to behave in public anymore. i find myself questioning a lot of the things i do. like should i have said hi to that person? or do people think i'm rude for not saying anything, especially at work. it's becoming a little bit insane...

i don't really have much to say i guess and i'm feeling terrible... i can't seem to focus so i'll end here. i just want to go home...