<< 08-12-11 >>

WANTED&QUALIFIED

@ 3:59 p.m.

wow. wow. wow. for the first time in my life, i actually feel sorry for yoy. the assistant manager at my job. because it is now that the impact of the situation truly hits me...

and at the same i feel so much elation. i don't mean elation at her misery, i mean real elation for a good cause and good reason.

i just pretty found out that 3 companies want my dick (well.. if i had a dick), but i mean really, they just fucking want me and can't get enough of me. i know all this sounds very conceited, but i'm just so fucking surprised since i never thought myself qualified for anything... i just turned in my letter of resignation today. my last day is next friday 19th. i talked to my boss on the 10th actually, and he wanted me to think about it and reconsider and staying with him. he was willing to match in pay with what i was currently receiving. i couldn't believe it. he currently pays me twice a monthly, which ends up $2700 a month. the new job is offering me 19.50 an hour, which is about $3300 to $3400 depending on how many days in the month. and my boss said he was willing to match $3500. i couldn't fucking believe it. and before all this happened, i was planning to join another company. they were offering me approx $3000 a month. i'm not sure if they were planning to pay me hourly or just a flat rate too, but anyway at that time, i was really looking forward to working with them beacuse they were such a stand up, good company. i had decided that if they accepted me, i would talk to my boss, and have him to pay men at least $3000, and if he did, i would consider staying with my company. little did i know, that i was worth even $3500 a month to him. HA! i mean, all this time i knew i was good, but i didn't know i was that good. just to let you know how much of a raise this truly is... I would essentially be getting paid as much as yoy would with this raise, and possibly MORE. and the manager, when i first started here back 2 years ago, he was making $3,600 a month. so yea, maybe my manager is making slightly more, but damn that puts me so close to how much my manager makes. that's fucking ridiculous...

anyway, i'm going to work with the new company. the one who is paying me 19.50 an hour. i had just turned in my letter of resignation with my boss. had my final talk and all that about leaving and how i've made my decision... and then i go back to my desk... and BAM. the first place i had interviewed for, the one that will pay me $3,000 wants to me. quote "We decided you are the most qualified candidate for [...] Our human resources will process the paperwork. We will send you an offer letter once the paperwork is processed. Hopefully sometime next week."

i couldn't fucking believe it. they want me too! after reading that, it really made me realize: what the fuck am i doing in this company? I'm totally qualified for bigger and better things. I AM FUCKING QUALIFIED. all this time, working here i just thought i was dilly dallying my time until something better came along. well guess what? something better doesn't come along, unless you go out there and grab it. and once i truly put my name out there, i finalized how qualified i am... i finally realized what more could be mine! what a great day. i haven't felt so alive in years. as if my life almost has some kind of meaning even. (maybe that's going too far, lol) the point is.. YES, WORLD I MATTER TO SOME COMPANY. I AM HARD TO REPLACE, AND I AM WANTED FOR MY SKILLS!

i can't wait to tell my mom the news that this other company wants me... hopefully we can come up with some scheme for me to try out this new job, and if it falls through or whatever, move to the new job. in a way, i really like the other company more, the one that pays $3000 a month, but damn, an extra $300 or $400 is super nice. between the two jobs, the reason i want the other one more: the other job is more stable. the company is super stable. the environment is super great, something i really like. has a very nice office feel. the other place, i didn't feel that as much. and the lady who interviewed me was in such a rush. she seemed so busy. i really don't like the idea of moving into an unstable dept like that. but anyway... i will see what my desk is like, what the enviornment is like, what my boss is like, if i like it, i will stay. if not.. i will delay it somehow to see if i can eventually accept a position with the other company, just starting ilke in Oct or something LOL!

what a great day. i haven't felt such elation in so long. if i were a guy, my penis wouldn't be long enough for everyone to have a piece :D lol

oh and as to why yoy's predicament sucks so much, and why i feel sorry for her... i know why she works here, and let's just say it's partly because she got herself in a hole... there's no way she can leave because the boss is helping her with something. and because of this situation, even if she wanted to leave, she couldn't. she probably wouldn't feel right leaving, and it's almost like my boss has something on her.. i guess he kinda does. and because of that, she can't even really ask for a raise... and if she did/she could and she got it, she really couldn't complain that it's not a big enough raise. and that's the difference between her and me. all this time, i couldn't stand her and stuff... and well, maybe that's just cause she's my superior. honestly, she could've been much worse. i guess i'm glad she wasn't worse. i just had no idea how much i should've been feeling sorry for her.. and on another note, asians are fucking stupid. i see her wasting so much money on clothes, bags, all this crap. because asians feel the need to make everyone jealous of them, and make everyone else think how great they've got it. i now realize she's barely making enough money to cover all that shit. what a fucking waste.

i'm totally, totally gonna spend my money better, on things that doesn't require impressing people. because people don't fucking care! i don't!