friendship books
@ 9:31 p.m.
so not only do i pen pal but i participate in these things called fbs, slams, decos, lyrix, etc. it all started with an fb; it always starts with an FB. the most common of all. fb- short for Friendship book come in all sizes and varieties, but the main point is that you sign it with your address and a description if you like. such as "*1970*" or "NSW" or "SNNP" or you could just write the date you signed it. 1970 would be the birth year in this case. NSW-New swappers wanted. SNNP-sorry no new pals. and i've been signing tons of these since i've been penpalling, and i've mailed tons of people who i have seen in FBs trying to find pen pals. this is how it all started for me. without these damn fb's i wouldn't have a single pen pal.
so today i got a letter from one of my pen pals, and in it contained an FB, with 2 address that i recognized. i used to write these 2 people. i only wrote them for a very short while, and then we stopped. most likely it was because they stopped writing me because i remember distinctly that in my search for tons of pen pals, i wrote back everybody that wrote to me and never rejected anyone no matter how little they wrote (literally a few of them wrote 5 sentences and one usually included "how are you?" and the end usually was "gtg" like-wtf why would you start a letter when you have to go 10 minutes later? but whatever, we were 13 years old), so anyway i'm sure they stopped writing to me, whether it might've been because the letter was lost in the mail, that's a totally different story. but man, good pen pals are hard to find. in any case, it was SO WEIRD seeing their address on there. apparantly one of them got married and had a kid... and i know this because she wrote it on there. mother to 1 boy. and her last name was different. when i reflect on this, i can't help but be forced to notice just HOW much time has passed... it seemed like just yesterday i was still in high school.
i know this sounds insane, but it felt so rude to be slapped in the face like that with such a cold harsh reality that i've been wallowing around the past few years. i'm only 23, but i wonder how many more years will pass so quickly and i'll still pretty much be exactly where i am now. i don't know how to handle that. i really thought i was going to accomplish more in my life than this.